What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize