sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
