guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize