Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
