Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize