brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
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