At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
