And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize