recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
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