we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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