I like my sex mixed with concussions.
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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