Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
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