Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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