Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize
