Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
no you cant smoke seaweed
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
My apartment stinks of burning failure
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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