She's JV to your varsity
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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