My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
i came on her dog
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
