I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
