Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
