I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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