he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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