The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
