your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Randomize
