TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
