Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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