come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
