Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
