haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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