Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Small penises have feelings too.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Randomize
