So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Randomize
