my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
Randomize
