Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Randomize
