i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
No I am not eating basil off your cock
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Randomize