Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Randomize
