is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize