i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
