i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
