I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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