I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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