We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize