Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
Randomize