I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize