Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
Randomize