We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
