I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
there was a trapeze. enough said
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
