another moral hangover. fuck.
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
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