kristin has been a bad kristin
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
