It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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