i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
what day is it and did you see me today?
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
