I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Randomize
