My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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